23 August 2008

For Sale???

Everywhere I go...I see signs just like this one...well at least various versions of bank owned properties, foreclosed homes, & for sale by owner signs. Some properties are well kept, some need some serious help! I guess I haven't really noticed them before...

"Before what?" you might ask...Well, before I gave any thought to buying my own home. It's been no surprise that I have been trying to move back to Escondido. I've been looking for a small home or maybe a townhome/duplex to rent with Timmery, but nothing's come of our search. We wanted to stay away from apartment life! It can be real noisy at times and busier than what we were looking for.

It's incredible how much the price of homes for sale have dropped, but don't get me wrong, buying is still expensive! I guess now is a GREAT time if you're a buyer, not so much if you're the seller! So today I drove around Escondido armed with many property listings my aunt sent me via email (she's a real estate agent if anyone is interested?). I was able to cross many off my list... some homes were in "sketchy" neighborhoods, some were just sketchy. I also found a few not on my list, just by driving around. Of course none of those have any $$$$ listed so I can even consider "Could this be the one?" I made a call on one. Left a voicemail with the promise of an agent returning my call quickly. That was 10AM, I still haven't received a call back (it's 7PM now).

Well, I'm more excited than ever before...that this could be a reality for me! Never in a million years did I think I would be considering buying a home. And all on my own! This IS a crazy notion that I am trying process. This is such a blessing, to even consider the reality of home buying! God is such a wonderful God! Hope is more present in my life now than ever before! Through and with God...ALL things are possible!

02 August 2008


After hearing Timmery talk about and reading her excerpts from "The Shack" (by William P. Young) on her own blog, I asked to borrow her copy so I could read it. I just finished it this morning and I must say, it definitely touched my heart and made me reflect on my own relationships...with the obvious: friends and family members, but also on my relationship with Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and God.

"It's all about relationships and simply sharing life.

What we are doing now--just doing this--and being

open and available to others around us. My church is

all about people and life is all about relationships."


"Each relationship between two persons is absolutely unique.

That is why you cannot love two people the same. It simply is

not possible. You love each person differently because of who

they are and the uniqueness that they draw out of you. And

the more you know another, the richer the colors of that


Before I finished reading this book, I had tears slowly streaming down my cheeks...blurring my vision as I struggled to finish up the last few chapters. And, if you truly know me, you know that tears don't come easy for me....I've always fought them and counted them as a weakness for me. But I know that it is in these tears that my pain can begin to heal as I let God wipe them away. Why is it that society always wants you to stop crying by offering you a tissue? Whereas God welcomes your tears as a chance to draw you in and be your only source of comfort. Does crying make others/outsiders uncomfortable? In all honesty, when I see people that I don't really know crying, I am uneasy. But when someone whom I'm close to cries, that uneasy/uncomfortable feeling is replaced with care and concern, it touches my heart in a way that calls me into action. Although I have no clue what to do, the response instinctively turns to being available and there for them, whatever way they need it.

One theme in this book is forgiveness..

"Forgiveness is not about forgetting, Mack. It's about

letting go of another person's throat."


"Forgiveness is first for you, the forgiver, to release

you from something that will eat you alive; that will

destroy your joy and your ability to love fully and openly."


"...you may have to declare your forgiveness a hundred times

the first day and the second day, but the third day will be less

and each day after, until one day you will realize that you

have forgiven completely."

Without forgiveness, you truly can't move toward God wholly and completely...whatever your situation. Forgivess is no easy task, but without it, you still grasp for control over your life versus giving back to God the control He rightfully desires as our Creator. One of my biggest obstacles was finding the ability to forgive my ex-husband for how our marriage ended (not to mention forgiving myself for my role as well). It wasn't of my own power that I was able to do so...I felt Him nudging me toward the need to forgive and during much prayer along with the help of email, I told him so. Such a burden was lifted from my shoulders and I didn't feel trapped and constricted anymore by that which held me down. My family didn't understand it when I told them what I did. Some didn't think it was wise to open up any form of communication with my ex...what they didn't fully understand was - the lines of communication weren't opened up with my ex, they were opened up with God.